Thursday, January 31, 2008

sinus rinse

I've had sinus issues for years. Remember when I had the liver function thingy and the doc looked at my throat and said I had "profound sinus drainage" and put me on antibiotics? Yeah, well, while I was taking the antibiotics for the mysterious "fat finger" issue, my sinuses cleared up amazingly well. I didn't realize how "profound" the drainage was or that there were headaches and stuff until they were gone. About a month after that it started coming back. I'm kind of tired of the whole antibiotic route and wanted to try something a little more natural. I got one of those sinus rinse kits and tried it out this morning. Okay, doesn't squeezing water up one side of your nose until it comes out the other side sound like some kind of torture to you? I mean really. I followed the directions the best I could with my head over the sink and saline solution dripping out the opposite nostril. A wanted to know if water would run out my ear if I turned my head. Nice girl, that one. Some of the water stayed with me until about half way through the day when I found that if I tilted my head to one side, something "profound" drained out. It happened when I tilted my head the other way too. And when I tipped my head back. That explains why it seemed like so much more water went in than came out the other side. The face/teeth pain is still there. I may try the torture, I mean sinus rinse, again this evening though. Maybe if I do it enough it will work. We'll see.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Surrender ramblings

This is kind of a long, rambling post. I hope it makes sense to someone who might need to hear it today. It’s just what’s been in my head and on my heart.

There are a whole range of emotions that you go through during an adoption. Just like being pregnant, you wonder if it will all turn out okay, what will the child look like, what will they act like, what will their personality be? Above all else you just want them to be healthy physically, mentally and spiritually. I’ve done both. We have two bio daughters and even though the second pregnancy and birth were rather difficult I still think it was easier than this adoption process. I had a good idea that the baby was going to be here within a specific amount of time. Sometimes I swear the waiting involved in the adoption process could drive me crazy. It makes no sense whatsoever.

I told you about the cars and how they both died within a 24 hour period. I was never worried about the cars because I knew that God would provide one way or another. I wondered then and I still wonder how I could trust God about the cars but I can’t trust Him about our son. Ultimately I have to get to the place where I can say, “Lord, I trust You with J. You love him more than I ever could and Your word says that You have his best interest at heart. I give him and the adoption process You.” I say that often, daily even. I’m not sure I totally mean it though. If I really meant it, I wouldn’t worry and fuss about the wait. If I truly believed it I wouldn’t pray “Lord, please bring J home. Let us hear good news today” every waking hour of every day. I wouldn’t “give it to God” only to take it back again a few minutes later.

I struggle with the fine line between being content in the Lord’s will and also being commanded to pray. If I’m not thinking about J and praying for him and the process then I feel like I’m somehow not acknowledging his existence. He does exist and we believe that God chose him to be part of our family. So then it becomes a big circle of praying and pleading with God to move and to bring our son home around to a place of turning him over to God. It feels like a huge circle going round and round and I’m not sure where I’m supposed to get off.

I remember dealing with similar feelings when we were building the house and T was out of work. I can remember asking God what would be so wrong about T having a job. Each job he interviewed for and didn’t get I would ask that. What would be so wrong about having a job? I can’t explain everything I felt during that time but we do believe that T is at the perfect job for him right now. It just wasn’t available when we first thought he needed it. He had to go through several short term jobs until the one where he was supposed to be became available. That was a hard process. Did we grow as a family? Yes. Did our faith grow? Yes. Was our marriage strengthened? Yes. What was meant for bad, God made good.

I also dealt with during that same time several times where I had to “give it to God” or “let go and let God.” That is not always an easy thing to learn. I remember Dexter being gone for several days and I was sure that he’d been eaten by a coyote or something. I was angry with God for taking my beloved cat. I actually had this conversation with God in my head one day. I still know exactly where I was standing in Mrs. H’s house (we were living with her while we built our house) when this occurred. I was begging God to bring the cat back, to let us find him. I sensed that God was saying to me to release the cat to His will. I told God no, that I wanted the goofy (I didn’t say goofy at the time but now I think it’s a little goofy) cat back. There was a real struggle in me of whether or not I would release control. I finally thought if I can’t trust God over a cat, how was I ever going to trust Him for a house and a job. I surrendered the cat to God’s will. It felt like an action. That was in the morning. We dropped the kids off at school and went to work on the house. On the way to Mrs. H’s that evening I saw what I thought was the cat. We stopped the car and I want you to know that I crawled under a pile of thorny, bushy junk to get that goofy cat. I stuffed him in my jacket and crawled back out. It turned out that he was afraid of a stray dog that had showed up so he wouldn’t come to the house. He’d been missing for about a week. God used a missing cat to show me a life lesson.

If you know me or have read my profile you know that I lead worship at our church. I get a sneak peak each week of what the sermon is about so I can kind of coordinate music. Sunday’s sermon was on stewardship. He used Psalm 24:1 “The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof, the world and those who dwell therein.” One of the songs we picked was “I Surrender All”. Boy, howdy. Just like with Dexter I felt that pull, that need to truly surrender J and the adoption process to God. Pastor even asked if there was anyone who needed to come up and pray. I was thinking oh yeah, I do. I needed to be at a place of total and complete surrender to God. About the adoption, J, T and the girls, everything in my life. My mind says, would it be so wrong to have J home? Is that the wrong thing to want? But a check in my spirit says I need to surrender it all.

I think I’ve come to a place of surrender. I hope I have anyway. I’ve been reading about Nate and Tricia and Gwyneth and their story with surrendering to God’s will. They are also thinking about and writing about organ donation. I’m about halfway through Charles Martin’s book “When Crickets Cry” which also deals with organ donation. This morning as I was thinking about surrender and thinking about organ donation I thought, I don’t want to be in a place where I have to loose a loved one and donate their organs or in a place where I or a loved one need an organ transplant. Why is God bringing these things in my life right now? I wondered if I truly was surrendering ALL to God. Wow, that hit hard. But then I thought, the best place to be is in God’s will. I’m probably not always going to like it and it’s not always going to be easy, but it’s where I want to be. None of us has guarantees in life. We don’t know what the next minute, hour or day will hold. I truly want to be in a place of surrender to Jesus. Maybe we’ll hear some good adoption news today, maybe J will never come home. I don’t know the answer to that. Another question that keeps "niggling" me is, am I as intent on my relationship with God as I am on getting J home? But that's a whole other post. :) Life is fragile and sweet. We have to find joy in the journey. We’re not guaranteed that we or our loved ones will return home safe each night or wake up the next day. Each day is a gift. Sometimes I want to scream at this stupid adoption process. I grieve for the time I’ve missed with J. But ultimately God loves him more than I ever could and things have to happen in His time. Whether we understand it or not, He does have our best interest in mind. “All to Jesus I surrender. All to Him I freely give. I will ever love and trust Him, in His presence daily live. I surrender all, I surrender all. All to Thee my blessed Savior, I surrender all.”

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Mind overload

Wow, there is so much in my head I'm not sure I can get it all out right now. I think I need more time to process it all. You know how sometimes you have something "niggling" at you and then somebody says something and it just jumps out at you? That's how it's been this last week. I have to work Mon. and Thur. Those are my usual days. I'm teaching abstinence on Tuesday and plan to stay with Mrs. H on Wed as she is having surgery tomorrow. Those are the changes, subject to plan. So, I don't know when I'll have time to process and get it all out. I definitely think that this blog has been therapeutic for me though. Stay tuned.

It seems like the fat finger saga is continuing in a new vein. I think I have a fingernail fungus infection in it now and that is why the nail has pulled away from the nail bed. It was just a hangnail for crying out loud. I still don't understand how removing the side of the nail helped the swelling and pain, but it did. Now this. Sigh...

I was working today and T was working on fence to increase our pasture. The girls were at play practice so no one was here to talk to J. I haven't talked to him since before Christmas so I'm really missing him. I just wish he could come home.

Oh, quick story. R's boyfriend has cats too. It seems that one of them lit his tail on fire by getting to close to the gas heater. He was running around the house and they were trying to put his tail out before he set the house on fire. It didn't even faze the cat much and he went back over and rubbed against the heater again. Crazy cat! We had one once that used to sit over the old gas furnace we had in a rental house. His whiskers were always singed and curled on the ends. Okay, that's it for cat stories for today.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Life in general

I talked to our O this morning. She said our file has the correct MOI number on it now and it has been sent back to Parquet to get some stamp that got missed the first time around. Sigh...ours is one of 9 that have been sent back. I don't know how long it will take to get fixed or how long it will take to get signed out of MOI once it gets back there. It feels like a nightmare that I can't wake up from. I guess it's good that they're working on it at least.

Please keep Lydia Livesay in your prayers. She is the 3 or 4 month old baby of Troy and Tara Livesay who just went back to Haiti. Lyddie is in a PAP hospital with bacterial meningitis. You can keep updated on her here; Also remember baby Gwyneth Rose who has some distention in her bowels. Her updates are at; Both of these blogs are listed under my "Blogs that I read" list.

Remember in one of my last posts I said that there was a cat purring behind me? Here is a pic of the way that cat curls up behind me in my chair at the computer.
And another one. Look at her toes.

This is Dexter sprawled out on the back of the recliner where A is reading a book. Yeah, he's looking pretty relaxed.

I know I show a lot of these pics of Sanome in the laundry but I think it's just too funny. She watches us when we do laundry and when we take it out of the dryer she really perks up. Then we dump it out on the bed to fold it and she comes running and leaps up onto the bed. She just loves to root through it and get snuggled up in the warm clothes. This is from today.

When T came home he found the other two cats curled up in his chair. They seem to pick a favorite spot for a period of time and then they move on to another favorite spot. Right now this is a favorite for both of them. Misty is giving me "the eye".

She was out of it in this one.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The change, subject to plan

Remember in my last post I said I'd be going to school today to teach the two abstinence classes that I didn't get to teach on Tuesday because school closed early due to weather. I said this was "the change subject to plan." Ha! They called school here before we even went to bed last night. We all slept in and then T went to the office to work in peace, without interuptions and the girls and I went shopping. Oh yeah, shopping was definitely more fun than school. We got a prom dress for R off of the $25 rack at a bridal shop. How cool is that? It fits her really well, too. She just wants to tweak a little here and there. She picked out 10-12 dresses and narrowed it down to about 4, then 2, and this one really looks good on her. It was between a blue and a pink. She tends to go with blue as it really sets off her eyes but the pink was the clear winner (after trying them back on, again). It's simple, but elegant. And it was $25! I'm so thankful that both of my girls like to shop for a bargain. They don't mind shopping the sales racks or at consignment stores. A even likes to go to thrift stores with me. R doesn't like the thrift stores very well but she will shop for bargains. They are both kind of picky about clothes (I don't even try to figure out what they would like or dislike) but neither of them have ever said they only wanted a certain brand of clothing or that they had to shop at a certain store. They have never asked me to pay an outrageous price for something either. I'm so thankful for that.

No adoption news yet today. Sigh...

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Weather, life, etc.

It has been c-c-cold here the last few days. My parents had a Haitian pastor visiting with them this last week and he came at a time when we've had near record lows. He is freezing. We went to Goodwill and pulled a few things out of T's closet and a friend did the same thing and found some sweaters and such. At least part of him was warm.

T and the kids were off yesterday for MLK Day. The news kept saying that we might have freezing rain/snow this morning and we thought we might get another day off. Nope, it was 34 degrees and raining when we got up so off to school/work we went. I was scheduled to teach 5 Abstinence classes this morning. Right after the first class they informed me that school was closing at 11. Huh?!? It was open early this morning when it was 34 and raining and now that it is 40 and raining, they close. I've heard two reasonings for this. One is that part of the county is/was icy and not all the kids could get to school. The other is that it might actually snow or freeze this afternoon. Either way, I finished two more classes and then I picked up the girls and came home. We're going to bake cookies. Tomorrow I'm not scheduled to work so I'll go back to school and do the two classes that I didn't get to today. That's the change subject to plan.

I was reading Leslie's blog and they are waiting on a child too. They are living in Haiti so they are waiting on a newborn or very young infant to adopt and they will be able to parent her from the beginning. The wait is getting to her. How well I understand. It's been 28 months of waiting for us. I've been thinking the end was near for over 6 months now. He's been legally ours for almost 8 months. This is insane. Some days it feels like he'll never come home and hoping hurts too much. Proverbs 13:12 says "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life." My hope has been deferred for so long that at times my heart actually hurts. It hurts so bad. I'm so ready to experience the longing fulfilled. It's been so long that I can't even imagine it anymore. I used to dream about how it would feel to bring him home, to show him his room and all the things that we've prepared for him. I don't even imagine it anymore because it hurts too much to hope. That's sad. I grieve for the lost time with him.

Hmm, it seems like a lot of my posts these days are following this vein. And like the other posts, now I must think of some things I'm thankful for. I'm thankful for a cat curled up behind me purring like a little engine. I can't figure out why she's purring, but she purrs a lot so she must be a happy cat. I'm thankful for the time at home today. I'm thankful that so far this week the cars have decided to run. I'm thankful for a fireplace and that T had a fire going in it when I got home from work yesterday. I'm thankful that Tricia is awake and talking. How cool is that?!? And I'm thankful that the Lord created chocolate. I really need some right now. The darker the better.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Sunday, a day of rest

Whew, we made it through the week. What a wild week it was. I post a prayer list for our orphanage each week on our yahoo group. I always put a verse in it. This week I put parts of Psalm 34 and I'll share it here too. (multiple verses) “I will extol the Lord at all times; His praise will always be on my lips. My soul will boast in the Lord; let the afflicted hear and rejoice. Glorify the Lord with me; let exalt His name together. I sought the Lord and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears…The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear Him, and He delivers them. Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him…The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and His ears are attentive to their cry…The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; He delivers them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit…” I thought it was fitting for multiple reasons. One is the resounding theme in my life right now to "praise God anyway" and this passage definitely covers that. Another thing I found fitting is that I feel "afflicted" in this adoption process. I love that it says the Lord is attentive to my cry and that He "saves those who are crushed in spirit." I am definitely brokenhearted and crushed in spirit. In retrospect, maybe it's not such a bad place to be. This passage says that God is good and that He works in those situations. I say, "Go for it, God!"

I have to say Happy Birthday to my cousin, D! Her birthday was yesterday. We were like sisters in our very early years.

R got to talk to J on skype today. She said he was very talkative and sang her a song. He was cutting up and making jokes and he asked for some blue tennis shoes, size 6. Yeah, right. The kid does not have a size 6 foot. Goofy thing. I missed him because I was visiting at my parent's house with a Haitian pastor and friends and family. We had a nice visit though. A couple that was there adopted from Guatemala. They started their process a few months before we did and their son has been home for almost a year now.

Please pray with several of us that are so close to bringing our kids home from the same O but we can't seem to move forward with the process. It's so heartbreaking. We're praying that this is a week of lots of breakthrough and forward movement. Sometimes I'm not sure God is listening to me anymore but then I think about Tricia and Gwyneth and it encourages me to keep going, to keep praying. Thanks. And now I think I'll rest.

Friday, January 18, 2008

The good, the bad and the ugly

The good news is we are a two vehicle household again. Thank God for that. T got the part for the Jeep yesterday and it was the wrong one. I had been talking to a co-worker about our car saga and mentioned that our friend who helped us so much this week had said something about some clips being broken. He said he had some of those clips but I told him that T had ordered the part. As soon as we got home yesterday T went out to put the new part on. He was back in the house in no time saying it didn't fit. Then he said the weird thing was he had to buy this whole stupid part when it was just the clips that were broken and then it didn't fit. I told him that our friend had said he had some of those clips. T called him, drove over and got them and had them on in no time. Problem solved. Not quite. It wouldn't start so he could take it for a test drive. Apparently there is some electrical thingy that tells the starter if the vehicle is in park. The electrical thingy is confused, or broken. T figured out which part of it was confused and kind of by-passed it for now. It started fine and they used it this morning to go to work/school. Hopefully that is the end of the vehicle saga for now. Thank God for a hubby who thinks outside of the box.

The bad news is we still haven't heard a thing about our adoption process.

The ugly is the way I feel about not hearing anything. I didn't get real flustered about the cars this week. I trusted that God could take care of us whatever happened with them. It could have seriously blown my week apart but for some reason I found it funny. They are things, but J is a human being. If I can trust God about the cars why can't I trust that He is doing His best for J? I am so seriously sick of the adoption process that I want to scream. I want to lay on the floor and kick and scream and throw a hissy fit. But no one is home so it wouldn't do much good. God is the only one who would see and He seems to respond the same way I responded when my kids threw a fit. He doesn't buy it. It doesn't move Him. Why does this have to be so hard? How is it possibly good? I don't know the answers to those questions and it drives me nuts. I so desperately want to hear some good news. I need to hear some good news. It's Friday and every week that goes by with no news is harder and harder to bear.

I guess that in my recent life theme of "praising God anyway" I need to think of some things to be thankful for. Let's see. Both cars are running. Smart hubby. Kids that got good report cards and helped out when needed. Mrs. H is feeling pretty good considering she has gall stones. We're all relatively healthy. Friends and family who helped out with rides, cars, etc. this week. It was pay week X2 (T and I both got paid this week-he gets paid once a month). We have clothes to wear and a house to clean. Down comforters-I had no idea how wonderful they were until I tried one. Tricia and Gwyneth are doing well (check them out at or link is under my blogs that I read). I no longer have tears streaming down my face from writing the previous paragraph. See, being thankful helps.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

this day just keeps getting more interesting

Well, I spent the evening in the emergency room with my "adopted mom" (a dear lady from church that we lived with while building our house). She had an ultrasound a while back and they told her she had some gall stones and needed to schedule surgery. She wasn't hurting so she never scheduled the surgery. Well she started hurting the last few days and it got real bad today and the doc told her to go to the emergency room. We were half way there when I remembered that I had tried a new med for fibro pain. I didn't know how I would react to it but thankfully it was fine. It actually helped quite a bit and only caused a little light headedness. Yay! After some morphine Mrs. H was feeling pretty good. Her bloodwork was completely normal so she was sent home with pain meds and told to schedule the surgery. I hope she listens this time. (Hi Mrs. H!)

T was stuck at work all evening. Computers went down and he had to stay until they were up and going. Obviously he couldn't work on the vehicles since he was working on computers. Enter good friend from last night. He looked at the Jeep and put some tranny fluid in it and came and got R. She drove it home and he followed behind to make sure it was ok. Thanks M!! He thinks it's just a broken tab on a hose that goes from the transmission to the radiator, or something like that. We're praying that's all it is. He is taking tomorrow off to work on the vehicles.

R is staying with Mrs. H tonight to make sure she's okay on the pain meds. She didn't even hesitate when we asked her if she would stay the night with Mrs. H. She did a lot of grown up, responsible things this evening.

When T and I finally got home we went out to check on the van. Guess what? It started. Glory to God. We'll still need to replace the battery but we're thrilled that it started.

What a week so far, and it's only Tuesday. Things to be thankful for; Mrs. H has no infection or obstruction and could come home. R and A's good attitudes and willingness to do what was needed. They got good report cards today too. The van started and ran fine. The Jeep got home and may just need a hose replaced. Good friends! The Jeep stalled at a place where there was room to get way off the road. This is especially miraculous considering the road he was on. The van stalled at the end of the driveway and we were able to get it into the barn by pushing it with the tractor. I'm really impressed with this new med. I had a sample of it for about 4 months and finally decided to try it. It's good to know that when the fibro is really bad I have something that can help. God is good. All the time.

One of those weeks...

...and it's only Tuesday. Heavens to Murgatroid. As you read this keep in mind that I'm not sobbing, having a fit, or any other negative type behavior. I'm laughing and I'm not sure why. ~ Okay, Monday morning R comes in the house just before she leaves for school and informs me that I "have to" water the horses because the tank is empty and she doesn't have time to fill it. Well, la di da, and who forgot to fill the tank on Sunday? Twerp. So I get ready for work and drive the van down to the water spigot and when I got out the van sounded funny, like it was still trying to start. I thought, you crazy thing. The key is not even in you and you are not turned on. Straighten up and die right. So I started it again to see if it would start and it did. I let it run while I attempted to water the horses. R unhooked the hose the last time she watered them but failed to lay it out straight so all the water would run out, and it was frozen. Nope, no water was going to go through that hose. So I got in the car and called my mom because dad left early in the morning to go out of town. I asked her if she could water the horses once the hose thawed out. It was a morning full of passing the buck to momma. I told her that something screwy was going on with the van and when I got to the end of the driveway I saw smoke coming out from under the hood. I turned it off and it actually stopped running this time and I called T. He came back home and got me and took me to work. The girls were originally going to get off the bus where I work and take the van so they could drive it to play practice. I made plans for my mom to take them to play practice and called the school to leave messages for them to ride the bus home. T made arrangements with a guy from church to help him tow the van up the driveway and into dad's barn. Can we do anything within the realm of normal? Nope. They pulled the van up here and then got the tractor out of the barn to put the van in. When I walked out there they were lining up the tractor to push the van. What?!?! I made a few suggestions and they got over ruled so I "drove" the van while friend held a flashlight up to his hand so T could see the hand motions to know what he was supposed to do with the bucket of the tractor to push the van. We went straight forward with it and then let it roll back to where it was lined up to go straight into the barn. Then lined it up and pushed it again. It worked and there were no new scratches, dents, etc. on the van. They decided the starter was burned up and T took it off, went to town to get a new one, and got it put on the vehicle by about 9 p.m. The battery is still dead. We don't know if it was just drained or if it's burned up too. It is currently in the barn on life support (battery charger). We're hopeful that it will start this evening and all will be well, with the van anyway.

This morning right after T and the girls left for school/work I got a call from T that something burned up on the Jeep. I didn't believe him. He kept telling me he was serious and I kept saying, no way. He hung up to look at it. Then he made a phone call and called me back. He told me where he was, that "the neighbor" took the girls to school (I don't even know yet which neighbor) that someone was stopping to get him to take him to work, and that he'd call that nice friend from church back and see if he could help haul home another one of our broken down vehicles. You know what I say? Ha!! It's all so crazy that you just have to laugh. It's funny. He is suspecting the transmission on the Jeep. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to drive a car with less than 100K miles on it. Both of these vehicles have long since passed that mark. The Jeep has 208K and the van has 189K. Apart from the fact that neither one of them work, they are really good vehicles. Really. I hope the transmission isn't shot. If it is, it's probably not worth repairing. Time will tell. I'll keep you posted.

I drove my dad's huge truck to teach my Abstinence classes this morning. I feel very small in it. We have another friend who has offered their truck to us while they are out of town this weekend. I thought that was very brave of them to offer, considering our current track record. I think we can figure out how to juggle the rides tomorrow IF the van decides to run. Otherwise I'm not so sure. We have one vehicle left. It's T's '66 Chevy stepside that has yet to be on the road since we've owned it. It's very close to being on the road, but not there yet. I figure it's pretty safe though. The only thing that could happen to it is for a tree or the carport to fall on it. A friend told me this morning about a Chuck Swindoll quote that goes something like this; Some of life's greatest opportunities come to us cleverly disguised as impossible situations. To that I say, "Have at it, Lord!"

Sunday, January 13, 2008

This a.m.'s service and "O" family pic

This morning's 10th Anniversary Celebration at church was wonderful. We're a small church and we had more people this morning than we've ever had-not that it's a lot mind you-but more than we've ever had. Our guest singer was awesome, the testimonies were inspiring and the message was short and sweet :) Hi Pastor! Then we had a potluck dinner that was good too. And good fellowship. I'm feeling a little worn out but this morning was worth it. I'm not sure if I'm actually coming down with something or if it's fibro fatigue. I'll know in the morning. ~ I'm starting abstinence classes at another school this week. That's always interesting to learn the dynamics of each class and their personalities. I'm not sure why the Lord stretched me into this area. I've never thought of myself as a teacher but it's a message that I think is very important. ~ Someone at our O got a big idea to make a family pic of the kids. All of them. In one pic. There were about 6 pics taken in the process of trying to get everyone in and somewhat looking at the camera. I'll show you 3 of them. We're not sure but we think J is in the lighter orange shirt kind of towards the bottom right of this pic.
In this pic we think he's more towards the middle. Heck, we're not sure if we're even pointing out our kid.
This is a pretty good one. They seem to all be in it and somewhat looking at the camera. I love the boy on the left "holding" the other little guy. It looks like he's about to drop him. You can tell he's slipped a little since the above pic. He was probably getting tired of holding him. Too funny. Poor kid (both of them).

Friday, January 11, 2008

ADD teenager and cats play fighting

I've always suspected that A has ADD. Not the hyper type, just ADD. Everything I read about it when she was little told me that she had it. We even had her tested once and they just didn't see it. The things that I read when she was in 2nd and 3rd grade said that a lot of ADD girls are never diagnosed because they don't have the hyper-active part that boys tend to have. It also said that it's not usually "caught" until they are in high school and have more responsibility and stuff that they have to keep up with. Hello, that is A. Most of the lower grades she's gotten in high school are due to not being able to find the homework that she did or just forgetting to do it. I can ask her multiple times about something and it still won't get done. Today my ADD child came home and said "500 dots". That's it. Just 500 dots. I looked at her like, what are you talking about and she said, "I have 500 dots on my finger" and showed them to me. I asked her how she knew she had 500 dots and she said she counted them as she put them on there. I asked which class she was in while she did that. It was geography (her daddy knew before he even asked which class she was in when she did it). Apparently her and her friend E (hi E!) wondered how many dots they could fit on one finger. I just said, "Please tell me you didn't use permanent marker." Here are 500 dots; top...

...and bottom. That's T's child.

The cats do a lot of play fighting. It usually starts with a slap of the paw...
...and proceeds to full blown wrestling. Goofy animals.

That's the news for now. Have you been keeping up with Tricia and Gwyneth at ?

More ramblings

I have the house to myself again this morning. Just me and the cats...and a mountain of laundry. R got her ACT results yesterday. She got a 26. Again. At least she's consistent. Her individual scores changed. Some went up, some went down. But her composite score was the same. Her English scores were in the 30's (no surprise there-she's been writing novel length stories since she was 14). She was checking out some college scholarship opportunities last night and her cat was helping her. Here they are looking at a few possibilities;

R is asking Sanome, "Should we look into this one?"
Sanome says, "I concur."

Okay, yeah, so maybe I have too much time on my hands at the moment. But the washing machine is going and the dishwasher is going. And I got up and made pancakes for everyone this morning too. I wonder if I can take a shower while the two machines are going. Oh, speaking of machines. J was quite enthralled with the washer and dryer at his grandparent's house when we visited in June. He was very helpful with the laundry as he wanted to push the buttons to turn "da machines" on. I wonder how long that will last if he ever gets home.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

I'm rambling again

I have the house to myself. T is at a meeting and the girls are at their play practice. I worked all day and brought a few groceries home. I set them on the kitchen floor and in the time it took me to use the bathroom Dexter (big black cat) ate a hole in the bread bag and ruined 3 pieces of bread (I threw away about 6-7 pieces just because of their proximity). He has a bread fetish. He has since we got him at 7 weeks old. I scolded him and he was not even fazed, even doing all his best little "chirpy, half purr half meow" sounds. Dumb cat. Or smart cat, probably.

I had a bad fibro day yesterday. I had a massage and sometimes I end up feeling sore afterwards and sometimes not. I just never know which it's going to be until a couple hours afterwards. was better though.

We are 28 months into the adoption process now. J has officially been our son for 7 1/2 months. We just need the signature from MOI to get the passport and then the visa and we can bring him home. It all seems so very wrong to have to wait so long and yet I have to believe that God is in control. It's so hard. I get scared sometimes thinking about why I need to have this much patience.

What's left of the nail on what was my "fat finger" is pulling away from the side a little bit. I'm not sure what's up with that.

Work was pretty good today. It was slow but I had a good time cutting up with a few of the dealers. I appreciate the relationships that come from my part time job. Living in a small town is usually pretty fun too. We have quite a few people that others might label eccentric. Makes it very interesting.

Our whole little church is getting pretty excited about our celebration Sunday and our special guest singer. I was telling a friend that I was a bit nervous about having to lead worship in front of our guest but she reminded me in a funny way that we are all human. Ha! Thanks D. Our practice went well last night though. I was able to share with my small group about Tricia and baby Gwyneth. Please keep them in your prayers. The link to their blog is in the previous post. Things are going as well as can be expected but the next 24 hours is critical for both of them. Please keep praying about this crazy adoption process too. I've been thinking the end was near for 6 months now. I never dreamed we'd be starting 2008 without J here.

That's my ramblings for now.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Adoption feelings

We've been busy getting ready for our church's 10th Anniversary celebration this Sunday. It's good that I've been busy because it helps keep my mind occupied. I've been doing okay with the wait the last couple of weeks even with the news about wrong file numbers and missing second legal stamps. Until yesterday when I saw a pic of J when we first started the adoption process. He was just a little boy and now he looks so much older. He is so much older. I thought about all the time with him that we've had robbed from us. It broke me down and I cried for the time that should have been ours together. Isn't that just like satan to try and rob us of everything good? he's such a jerk. But God is in control. He has a plan. Plans to prosper us. Plans to work things together for our good. ~ My problems and frustrations were brought into perspective when I "cyber met" these people. I learned about them from another one of the moms adopting from the same O that we are. A friend of hers roomed with Tricia's sister in college. This is a young woman with cystic fibrosis who was being put on the lung transplant list but then she found out she was pregnant. The pregnancy has taken a toll on her body and they had to put her on a ventilator and take the baby at only 6 months along. The baby weighs 1 lb. 6 oz. and her momma has been asleep since she was born. Pray for these people. I feel a kinship of sorts with them maybe because Tricia was adopted and maybe because Nate is a worship leader. I don't know. But here is a family where two members are fighting for their lives. A husband and father whose wife and child are in critical condition. Our son is not with us but he is happy and healthy. I thank God for that.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Some pics from the trip

This is some snow on the mountain.

Here are some deer grazing in the mountains.

My "brudder" (my older brother) driving a go-cart. He bumped his daughter and got her stuck against the side of the track until an attendant could come and push her off.

Me, waving from my go-cart. The hill we were going down in these pics is much larger when you're actually in the cart than when you are looking at it in pictures. It really is.

R, in her cart. The pics I have of A are a little blurry. Probably due to the rate of speed she was driving at. She passed everyone up.

Icicles hanging from the side of the opening to a cave.

Snow on the side of the road. We don't get much snow in TN. Every once in a while we get 4-6 inches. It's been about 4 years since we've had that much. But if you consider how hilly and curvy the roads are and our lack of snow experience it's probably good that it only comes like that every few years. Of course, school closes for every flake that flies.

More of the same.

I love this pic of the frozen fountain. I just think it's beautiful.

My dad has some more pics. If I get some from him that are blog worthy, I'll share.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

We're baaaack

Wow, I just got finished catching up on the blogosphere. A bunch of stuff going on with a lot of people.

We had a very nice few days with my family. R got to ski for the first time compliments of her uncle. She actually made it down the hill once without falling. She took out two different people on two separate occasions. She was sliding on her butt, hollering at them to look out when she took them out. My nephew has been skiing before but when he tried a different run he said he went down it the first time on his back. He also said he went faster on his back than he did the other times on his skis. Too funny. We celebrated my parent's 45th Anniversary and my 40th birthday. We rode go-karts, played laser tag, shopped, played more games, sang and played guitar, and laughed a lot. A has a confirmed nickname now. It ends in "nator" (think the "Terminator") since she passed all of us up in the go-karting. She says it's all the Need for Speed video games that make her so good at it. She can try for her learner's permit in Feb. We are scared.

It's good to be home. I missed my bed with the touch foam mattress pad. Our cats were very busy (or maybe stir crazy) while we were gone. One of them left a present near the end of our bed. Judging by the skid marks on the carpet it was a dangler that needed help letting go. One of them left a hairball in the dining room. Rugs were scattered, things were tipped over. Yes, they were very busy indeed.

I'll post pics when I can. I need to make some dinner as the natives are restless. I also need to unload my new flatware from the dish washer. Yay! I've been hunting for it for about six months and was able to find it at an outlet for a better price than I've seen anywhere. With Christmas and birthday money from multiple sources I was able to get what I really wanted. I'm so excited.

The only thing that would have made the trip better was to have been able to share it with our son. No news yet. Sigh...